Remember surrender

It strikes me that when we take off our masks, we see ourselves as we really are, and that scares us; this is the main reason we wear the masks.

Every time I say I'll surrender I go back. This is killing me, is there a way to give it up to God and leave it with Him? Can I stop taking it back? Guys, can you pray for me? There's stuff that I have to give up and I always say I will but I don't seem to actually be doing it. I don't know if that makes any sense to anybody, but whatever. There's a song I really love by Sara Groves, it's called "Maybe there's a Loving God". And this is how it goes.

I'm trying to work things out, I'm trying to comprehend
Am I the chance result Of some great accident
I hear a rhythm call me The echo of a grand design
I spend each night in the backyard Staring up at the stars in the sky
I have another meeting today With my new counselor
My mom will cry and say I don't know what to do with her
She's so unresponsive I just cannot break through
She spends all night in the backyard Staring up at the stars and the moon
They have a chart and a graph Of my despondency
They want to chart a path For self-recovery
And want to know what I'm thinking What motivates my mood
To spend all night in the backyard Staring up at the stars and the moon
Maybe this was made for me For lying on my back in the middle of a field
Maybe that's a selfish thought Or maybe there's a loving God
Maybe I was made this way To think and to reason and to question and to pray
And I have never prayed a lot But maybe there's a loving God
Maybe this was made for me For lying on my back in the middle of a field
Maybe that's a selfish thought Or maybe there's a loving God
Maybe I was made this way To think and to reason and to question and to pray
And I have never prayed a lot But maybe there's a loving God
And that may be a foolish thought Or maybe there is a God
And I have never prayed a lot But maybe there's a loving God