I'm such a sucker sometimes

Christmas with the family... good times, but too much food and too many people. I'm far too lazy for this exercise regime we've been given. I'll do it though - I like playing basketball. It was always the only sport I was ever half decent at. It sucks this time though because I am forced to choose between basketball and kids club. That was hard.
I'm starting to annoy myself. It happens now and again. And I'm frustrated that I am not spiritually how I want to be, but I can't seem to change that. Oh, wait, God's supposed to do it. I suck at letting Him. I don't know how this works but I want it, I want to live in the Spirit and have Him live in me so others can see. How does one accomplish living in God when one has trouble just living? Besides God, I don't know how I'm alive. How do I surrender myself completely to Him then? I feel trapped in a conundrum and I have no idea how to get out. The irony of this is that God is the only One who can get me out. Hallelujah.

Let it rain

If I knew how I would tell you something, but it is not my place to tell you. Shucks.
By the bye, your conscience is in my head, and I don't want it. You can have it back. I want to go home to school so this doesn't distract me so much. Funny, because when I was at school I was excited to come home for Christmas so the same thing wouldn't distract me there. I just can't get away from myself.
I've had a song in my head the last few days, pretty much it's singing back there ever since we were driving home from Hershey. It's by Switchfoot, and it reminds me of... stuff.

Face down with the LA curbside ending
In the ones and zeros
Downtown was the perfect place to hide
The first star that I saw last night was a headlight
of a man-made sky, but
Man-made never made our dreams collide, collide
Here we are now with the falling sky and the rain,
We're awakening
Here we are now with the desperate youth in pain,
We're awakening
Maybe it's called ambition, but you've been talking in your sleep
About a dream, We're awakening
Last week saw me living for nothing but deadlines,
With my dead beat sky
but, this town doesn't look the same tonight
These dreams started singing to me out of nowhere
And in all my life I don't know that I've ever felt so alive, alive
Here we are now with the falling sky and the rain,
We're awakening
Here we are now with the desperate youth in pain,
We're awakening
Maybe it's called ambition, but you've been talking in your sleep
About a dream, We're awakening
I want to wake up kicking and screaming
I want to wake up kicking and screaming
I want to know that my heart's still beating,
It's beating,
I'm bleeding.
I want to wake up kicking and screaming
I want to live like I know what I'm leaving
I want to know that my heart's still beating,
Is beating,
Is beating,
It's beating,
I'm bleeding
Here we are now with the falling sky and the rain,
We're awakening
Here we are now with the desperate youth in pain,
We're awakening
Maybe it's called ambition, but you've been talk, talking in your sleep
About a dream,
We're awakening a dream,
We're awakening

Here we are now, awakening

There is one secret I've never told you. I've never even alluded to it. You'd understand why if I told you. But I never can. Sometimes it frustrates me.

I'll take my heart back

The fact that you are you frustrates me. I love it, but it is still frustrating, because you are right and I know it. I am so glad we are friends. You challenge me in my faith like no one else does, not really even anyone at school, which is where you think the challenging would happen. Don't get me wrong, it does, but one weekend with you challenged me so much. You're one of the better friends that I have and you have blessed me so much. Keep chasing your first love. He'll bless you for it.
It's good to be home. Holidays were good too. Actually, they were a huge blessing. Sometimes I'm tempted to take your advice, but then I catch myself. That would be a stupid move, especially at this point in my life. Anyway, it's not my move to make.
I enjoy horses and buggies, even though it's next to impossible to get a decent picture of them. I also enjoy the fact that they go past at 1:30 in the morning. My favorite part though was the night we went for a walk to the creek and sat on the rock. And when you played your guitar in the rain. "If all else fails then we will meet up in eternity."

I believe...

Trevor Zacharias is my baby's daddy.

Apparently some people found this offensive. I thought it was hilarious. And hey, I got a purple shirt out of it.

Dwight: "Two grand pianos?!?!"
Paul: "Well, yeah. How do you think they got puppies?"

Susan: "Are you waiting for class, or is this your harem?"