Welcome to Nowhere

Okay, so welcome to my blog. This is where you want to look to find out where I am, what I am doing, and what I am learning. If you are reading this then you probably know, or are about to find out, that pretty soon I am headed to Abbotsford B.C. for two months, and after that, Guadalajara, Mexico, for 7 months, as an intern at the Matthew Training Center. Thank you for coming along on my journey. Thank you for praying. (This is also where you will find prayer requests.) Thank you for supporting me, be you the church, or friends from school, or family, or anyone else who randomly stumbles across here and reads.

I just wanted to explain the name of this blog. "Unaccounted for" is how I often felt growing up, especially in high school. Like I didn't fit. Like I didn't belong anywhere. One thing God has been teaching me lately is that I belong with Him, and He'll take care of the rest. He'll supply my nourishment, both figuratively and literally. When I belong to God, I don't belong to the world. I think that I am still unaccounted for now, but in a different way. I am accounted where it matters.
"Welcome to Nowhere" is the title of a poem I wrote 2 1/2 years ago, while on my freshman year missions trip to Calgary with Bethany College. (This is an unashamed plug for Bethany. It's wonderful. It will change your life. Go.) This trip changed my life. I realized there that missions is about people, not going places. And people are right in your backyard. Maybe in your house. At the office. Missions is about glorifying God in your life, wherever you are. And often there are hurting people around you everywhere. This is Nowhere. The people that are hurting, the people surrounding you that you never see because you see them every day. Nowhere is the places that everyone always looks past, because it is normal. Nowhere can be the inner city. That's where I found it. Nowhere can be your job. Nowhere can be East Berlin. And for me right now, Nowhere is Mexico. I am certain this is where God is sending me for now, and no matter what happens, I am going to trust Him. Thank you for coming, and please keep reading, but also, go out into your own Nowhere. And glorify Him.

I found a door to Nowhere
It really was absurd
And I looked back at Somewhere
Feeling free as a bird
I walked through that door to Nowhere
And found myself in love
Perhaps that land of Nowhere
Was my calling from above
And now I live in Nowhere
But they all know my name
Since I found that door to Nowhere
Nothing was ever the same

I'm tired of sleeping

The music is loud
And the words cut deep
It's not a bad thing, but
I'm too tired to sleep
I miss so much, so far away
You know I've broken my wings
I've burned all my bridges
Left for lesser things
I'm tired of waiting
Why won't you arrive
And then we are set free
Then we're alive
Feel the fire it traces
It draws lines in the night
It shows all my old scars
And sets them alight

Long time, long time in coming

I have come to the conclusion that friendship is inconvenient. This, I think, is the major reason I refuse to get facebook. Because true friendship is inconvenient. It means going out of your way, and it costs something, be that $40 to help someone who's broke, or 56 cents for a stamp. Not everyone you ever meet will be this kind of friend. I just don't see the point of conveniently being "friends" with 400 people when I could inconveniently be good friends with 20. I would rather catch up with you over coffee once a month than see all your doings from a distance every day. It seems more real to me. And as for far away ones, I would rather get a letter or a telephone call once a month than an email or a mass facebook message every other day. I would rather be real the only way I know how.

I don't think anyone reads this anymore, but if you do, congratulations. I just needed to get this out, one way or another.