Sleeping through church

So it rained all weekend. The rain kind of reflects my mood. It makes me want to write poetry and be wet. It makes me want to curl up in front of a fireplace with hot chocolate and a [boy] friend. It makes me want to dance, or do crazy things that defy normalcy. Rain makes life interesting. As does music. There's emotions dancing in my soul that I haven't felt in a long time, that I don't want to feel. Some things people say they have no right to say, because I never shared all my secrets. You never knew the whole story, so you really can't say my motives. And some people are too stubborn to see past their own barriers, the ones that are only in their mind. I'm tired. I don't want to think anymore. I just want to be. I want to dance, I want to laugh. I want all my worries and my jealousy to go away. I need to get out.
On another note, Bright Eyes was bloody amazing. That is about all I have to say on that subject, except now I have a minor unfortunate obsession with Conor Oberst. Oh well, it will wear off soon. "This is a song about being somewhere you're out of place. Like... flamingos... in West Edmonton Mall. Or... a pirate ship... in West Edmonton Mall. Or... me... walking around in West Edmonton Mall."
I have found my goal in life: to disprove what everyone else wants me to be. I'm tired of people [teachers] telling me to be a writer. I DON'T WANT TO BE A WRITER!!! Frick. I want to maybe get into med school, either med or vet med. Or maybe I don't want to go to university at all. Perhaps I will go to Bible school and then be a housewife the rest of my life. What would everyone say to that, eh? Perhaps I will live on the street. I don't want to do what everyone expects me to do. I just want to be me. Why is that so hard?